New Home

I decided it was time to merge my two blogs and move to a new home. I will now be posting (baby & life stuff) on Katastrofik Katacombs over on Wordpress.

My Kitty is Home

I was out with a friend of mine when I got a call from "Home" on my cell phone. Expecting to hear James' voice what I heard was my baby yowling! I instantly knew it was him (he's a Siamese, no other cat makes those sounds) and I burst into tears. I was on my way to a movie but I raced home to see him. It turns out he wandered quite a way and ended up with an older couple. They had to get one of their cats put down and when they were at the SPCA they saw our poster. They called us and James went to pick him up. He had lost a lot of weight and is covered in little cuts (which James thinks make him look tuff) but he is home and he is perfect. He apparently hadn't eaten much while he was away so he made up for it when he got home. His first night he ate an entire chicken breast, 3 bowls of cream and a whole bunch of crunchies. He's back following James around the house and sleeping on me and we are as happy as can be. xo

Halloween Baby Invites

I'm co-hosting a Halloween themed baby shower for one of my best friends. It's going to be so much fun. Here are the invites:







I'm in charge of all the pretty stuff. I'm bringing the decorations, favours, organizing the blessing beads and will be making a scrapbook for her after the baby is born.

kittehs

Sorry for the ramble. I just needed to get out my feelings. xo

Still no Spike. it has been 2 weeks today since my baby ran away. I'm still looking and I absolutely refuse to give up hope. James wakes up with nightmares all through the night and has not been able to write anything since Spike took off. I think I've become addicted to Attivan. It's the only thing that will settle me down enough at night so that I can actually get some sleep. Our bedroom is on the second floor and I keep my window open in case I hear him. Of course I hear 'him' every 10 minutes of so because there are about 2 dozen cats that live in our complex (we all share a courtyard/playground) not to mention all the crying babies that sound an awful lot like a kitty crying for his mum. I performed a spell last week and light a candle every night and ask Bast (the Egyptian goddess of cats among other things) to bring my baby back. I hear she likes offerings of catnip so I give her that too.

The Friday before last (Aug 7) was my birthday. I already knew it was going to suck because my baby was missing. Then I got a phone call that someone had seen him. I had put up a poster near the park where the junkies hang out and the hookers ply their wares because it was half way between our old house and our new house. Also, one of my co-workers said she saw a Siamese cat in the parking lot there at McDonalds. I wasn't very hopeful until I got there. There he was in all of his un-neutered Siamese beauty (In case yr the type to read ahead, don't bother, it wasn't him). there he was running down the lane. i followed him and freaked him out because I was practically screaming out "Spike" and sobbing the whole time thinking it was my baby. But he didn't seem to know who I was and kept running away. After about an hour of searching for him I found him again under a house. yes, I was actually lying on my chest under a house where the ground had been dug up. Did I mention that this house was on the corner of what is well known to be the worst corner in all of nanaimo? So I chased this cat around for about an hour and ended my moment of glory by sitting down and sobbing on a broken chair in an alley. my mum brought james down who convinced me that it wasn't Spike. A neighbour of the house I was under came out and told me he had been around for about 3 months and that she had been feeding him whenever he came around. I think I knew by then that it wasn't Spike. he was bigger, and had a darker face and a slight crossed eye. After collecting me from my alley, we went home where I cried some more over my missing baby.

We have met a lovely Bermese kitty who we have named Lady Gaga due to her obnoxious white blonde hair and fabulously spunky personality. I have had numerous phone calls from people who has seen "a furry siamese" out in the marsh behind out complex. I used to get hopeful but now I know it's her and ask people whether it's a short or long haired cat and they always say long. She's nice company when we're out hunting for our boy, along with Paulie and Shadow (the other marsh cats). They all certainly are in need of some love.

Today I got a call from the SPCA that a Siamese had been brough in who had been hit by a car and was in bad shape. They had my poster so they called me. James wasn't home so I called my mum to come to the Vet with me. I went in and he was all broken and hooked up to machines. He looked darker than my boy and didn't show any sort of recognition towards me at all. He looked just like the other kitty (Doppleganger kitty) but I couldn't be sure because he was so broken and drugged and out of it. I cried a bunch for my baby and for this one (still not being sure if he was mine) but I couldn't be sure until James came. James finally got home and came with me to check and said it definitely wasn't him. Spike has one white toe and a crook in his tail (from when he used to chew it). I felt such relief that it wasn't Spike but then I felt horrible for feeling that relief. James and I had talked about going back and getting the street kitty if we could ever catch him (we drove by about once a day) and in the back of our minds we had claimed him as ours. James stayed with him and pet him and talked to him and made him purr. He wanted to take him and tell the vets we would pay for his surgeries but the vet said he was better off just to be put down. They said he wouldn't be able to walk and had suffered so much internal damage that he might not make it even after having his legs amputated. So then we cried some more for the kitty who could have been. We cried because we wanted to give him love and he had been a street cat in a trashy neighbourhood and never got a chance. If we had taken him home last week when I found him, this would not have happened. I feel horribly guilty for that even though there's nothing we could have done.

So now I am back at home and I am exhausted. I am missing my boy and mourning the other one. I will light two candles to Bast tonight and ask her to protect Doppleganger Kitty and to watch after my Spike and bring him home. xo

Witches and Babies and Other Fun Stuff (but still no Spike)

Yesterday was Nanaimo Pagan Pride day down at Kin Hut Park, hosted by The Temple of the Green Cauldron. I got there for the 7AM set up and didn't get home until almost 10PM. Long, wonderful day.
I went to a drumming workshop but realized half way through that having slammed my finger in a car door a few days earlier, banging said thumb on a tight piece of leather was not a good idea. I missed the Druid workshop because I was busy getting a veggie burger. There was lots of fabulous music, some belly dancing, great shopping (I bought a beautiful besom! and some other trinkets), and an hour-long Druid ritual. I wasn't really enjoying the Druid ritual (different energy from what I'm used to, not for me) but my mum showed up around that time so we hung out and looked at jewelery and crafts and chatted.
The thing I was most looking forward to was the Doula & Childbirth information session but it was canceled! I mentioned to my friend Roxie how disappointed I was and she said that the lady who was supposed to host it was there so I went and talked to her. I had thought that the only training I could do to become a Doula was at Douglas College in New West which was pretty expensive and totally not convenient to get to (3 hours travel each way including a ferry and the need to find accommodations in New West). Well....... fabulous news is that I can train through Childbirthing International!!! At home!!! For less money!!!!!! yeah!!!!! I am so excited. She also gave me some information on books to read and different websites and mummy/baby/blessingway goodies sellers. I decided when i was about 15 or 16 that I wanted to be a midwife but after a lot of considering, I realized I am more interested in the emotional and support aspect that the actual physical birth itself (although I'm of course interested in that too!). Then I learned about Doulas and it seemed as though a career/life/dream had been designed just for me. I am so excited I could explode.
Another great aspect of the day was making a new friend. Her name is Ivania and she's a member of the Temple. We had met before but never had the chance to chat. She has a boy who is almost a year old so I took the opportunity to grill her about pregnancy, childbirth, and hippie parenting. She gave me her email and phone number and told me I could call her with any questions I ever have. Awesome.
Bad news is that Spike is still not home. I miss him so much. James and I are having a hard time with our daily tasks (eating, sleeping, working) and have both missed work this week. I have put up hundreds of posters and searched numerous neighbourhoods, shelters, and vets but still no Spike. It has been almost 2 weeks and my heart is breaking. I am not giving up though. He will come home. He has to. xo

whatever

I feel like I have been searching for ever for Spike. I put up another round of posters today (about 50) and walked all over my neighborhood. Every night I run downstairs at the slightest noise and I look out my window every five minutes or so. My heart hurts so much it is hard to breathe sometimes. My head hurts from crying. I don't feel like he's been hurt, I feel like someone has him. My mum had a dream that he was in the subdivision behind us so I plastered their telephone poles with posters. I suppose we shall see this evening when folks get home from work if anyone has seen him.
My job interview was postponed until Monday which is just as well since I woke up at 5 this morning and didn't get to bed until 2 the night before so I'm not so great with people right now. Apparently my interview will last an hour and a half or so and they were crazy busy today so now I'll be meeting her on Monday.
Tomorrow is Nanaimo Pagan Pride. It's the first year that I will be attending. I have been "out of the broomcloset" forever but I never really had much of an interest in practicing with others until I met the ladies from The Temple of the Green Cauldron when they performed our handfasting. I foolishly volunteered to work the set-up shift so I have to be there at 7 AM and set tents/booths/whatever up until the event opens at 11. It should be a fun day. There will be an opening and closing ritual done by the Temple as well as a 90 minute ritual performed by a local Druid group. I'm really looking forward to some shopping as well and to the doula information session. I'll have pix to post later. xo

Still Missing

My baby is still missing. I have no energy to do anything at all. Then I slammed my finger in my car door. And James' auntee has ovarian/uterine cancer. I just want to crawl into a hole or at the very least back into my bed where I seem to be spending an awful lot of time lately.
On a sort of good note, I have a job interview at Urban Planet on Friday. It's for a key-holder position (full time). I wasn't seeking out full time but I'll certainly take it if it's offered. xo